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Title : Divorce and Children
Description : The better question might be why do they get married in the first place, and then end up in divorce? Usually, people who end up in a courtroom trying to get things settled and get rid of a no-longer-wanted marriage are concerned with practical issues. They want to make things straight as soon as possible. What they want perhaps is an agreement that can put order in their business, an agreement on all the aspects that are involved in a divorce trial. These aspects may include children’s custody and who can get access to them, and the two conflicting spouses, who unfortunately cannot usually differentiate their status as husband/wife from that of parents. These two qualities - spouse and parent - seem to have very little in common, after all. We could actually say that all the problems related to divorce and especially children’s custody and the right to visit them are in fact related to the definition of powers and to the control parents may have over children. So power and control, these are the two main things that interest the two that wish to separate. If things boil down to that, it can be a very sad fact indeed. Parents should at least try and agree on a children’s visit schedule or with whom children will stay, to make things less complicated and less traumatizing-if possible-for the little ones. Parents should be able to determine what is best for their children and for them also. It is perhaps a good thing also if parents try and understand the fact that children should be able to develop good quality relationships with both parents. And in order to do that, children most certainly need to spend a lot of time with both parents. Although each family has its own story and particular situations, there are some things to be followed when it comes to giving the rights to educate and take care of his child to one particular parent. These criteria may be based on the results of social check ups on both parents, to verify the conditions in which the child/children are supposed to grow up, and what influences they may have in their educational process. Of course, another major aspect to deal with when trying to decide to whom give the children for care is the children’s very own opinion on the matter. After divorce, what parents generally do is to try and repair their life, and therefore look for other potential partners (if this hasn’t already happened, in the sense that the reason for their divorce was one of them being unfaithful). According to experts in child’s psychology, it is important for the kids to see a good example of husband-wife relationship. So experts consider it is best for that parent who has gained custody over children to find a proper spouse in order for the children to behave and develop as normal as possible. Otherwise, the children may be clueless as far as what it takes to have a good marital relationship and this of course can affect them in the future, when they grow up and they may prove to be quite unfamiliar with what it takes to be a good spouse and parent. For instance, let’s say that the reason why a couple got divorced was the husband’s cheating on his wife (or vice versa). In that particular case, the wife has the tendency to keep his children away from their father, and generally has negative feelings towards the "new woman" in their ex-husband’s life. But unfortunately, this may affect their children in a negative way. Children may feel deprived of their father’s love, attention and care, and may become victims of psychological traumas that are not so easy to heal in the future. Although it is obviously not a desirable thing to come ever to the solution of divorce, if it cannot be avoided, the ideal thing for all parties concerned is to adopt a non-conflict attitude, in the sense that each (and this concerns mostly the two parents, for children may be too young do discern) should look for the others’ if not benefit, at least smallest harm possible.
File Name : Divorce and Children.txt
File Type : text/plain
File Size : 3.99KB
File Category : Document
Level : -
Subject : Bahasa Inggeris
Rating : 2.76 Stars (Click the stars to rate )
Version : 1
Update : Feb 22, 2011
Posted By : School Admin - SMJK YOKE KUAN (SELANGOR)
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